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The Trust Tax
Why some people have to prove themselves twice — and what that costs at work
Daniel Dixon
May 21, 2025
We talk a lot about fairness at work. About equal opportunity, inclusive culture, and psychological safety. But beneath the surface of even the most well-meaning teams, there’s often an invisible layer of imbalance, one that’s harder to name, but deeply felt.
It’s not always about discrimination in the formal sense. Sometimes it’s about who gets the benefit of the doubt. Who’s assumed to be ready. Who’s seen as a “natural leader”, and who has to keep proving they belong.
This week’s edition looks at something many of us have witnessed, and some of us have lived: the trust tax.
A Timely Insight
You’ve likely seen it before. Two people start at the same level, with similar skills. One is quickly assumed competent, given stretch opportunities, included in key conversations. The other? Held at arm’s length, needing to prove and re-prove themselves before trust is extended.
This is the invisible tax some people pay at work, a tax on trust.
It’s not always overt. Sometimes it shows up in the language we use.
“I just need to see a bit more from her.”
“He’s still growing into the role.”
“They’re not quite leadership material yet.”
Other times, it’s structural. More oversight. Less access. Fewer second chances.
And often, it’s internalised. When you’ve spent years navigating doubt or scepticism, it changes how you show up. You overprepare. You stay late. You avoid risk. You second-guess yourself even in moments of clarity.
This is what we call the Trust Tax, the extra labour, caution, and emotional strain that some people carry simply to be seen as equally capable.
Toolkit: From Proving to Growing
Use these prompts for individual reflection, team dialogue, or in leadership coaching conversations.
For individuals
When have I felt the need to prove my worth more than others?
What strategies have I used to gain trust or be seen as competent?
How has that shaped the way I show up, speak up, or slow down?
For leaders
Who in my team do I naturally trust? Who do I scrutinise more closely — and why?
What assumptions might I be making about confidence, capability, or ‘fit’?
How can I shift from requiring proof to creating space for growth?
These questions are not about blame. They are about noticing. Because awareness is the beginning of equity
In behavioural and organisational psychology, this dynamic has a name: the competence-likability trade-off. It explains why women, people of colour, neurodivergent folks, and others outside dominant norms are often assessed more critically, or seen as either capable or likeable, but not both.
We also see echoes of:
Implicit bias — unspoken beliefs that shape perception
Attribution error — assuming success is luck for some, but merit for others
Affinity bias — trusting those who feel familiar
Cognitive load — the mental energy spent managing impression and belonging
These patterns often exist beneath the surface. But their impact is very real. They lead to missed promotions, burnout, self-doubt, and cultures that unintentionally reinforce exclusion, even when they talk about inclusion.
And the most frustrating part? Many people paying the trust tax are some of the most capable, thoughtful, and committed professionals in the room.
If we want cultures of true belonging and performance, we need to recognise the systems and signals that ask some people to prove themselves twice.
Think of someone who isn’t the loudest voice in the room, but who consistently adds value.
How is their contribution recognised?
How much trust is extended to them — not just personally, but structurally?
Now, turn the lens inward.
Where in your work have you felt the need to be extra careful, extra polished, extra credible — just to be taken seriously?
What if you didn’t need to carry that weight?
And if you're in a position of influence, how could you help remove that weight for someone else?
Trust should be a bridge, not a burden.
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